GOVINDA

    togeto spend time of rest betesan Kamala o tama for a gift. alk of an old ferryman, o see tire life by tion by t of y, tlessness and till  peris.

    o to ferry  off t on to t;Youre very good to us monks and pilgrims, you  you too, ferryman, a searc pat;

    Quot;Do you call yourself a searcamas monks?quot;

    quot;Its true, Im old,quot; spoke Govinda, quot;but I  stopped searcop searco be my destiny. You too, so it seems to me, o tell me somet;

    Quot; so tell you, o youre searcoo muc in all t searc find time for finding?quot;

    quot;; asked Govinda.

    quot;; said Sidd;t mig till see is t o let anyter  t of  finding means: being free, being open, riving for your goal, t see,  of your eyes.quot;

    quot;I dont quite understand yet,quot; asked Govinda, quot;;

    Quot;A long time ago, o t doo guard , o recognise t;

    Astonis of a magic spell, to the ferrymans eyes.

    quot;Are you Sidd; imid voice. quot;I  ime as ing you, Sidd, Im o see you once again! Youve c, my friend.--And so youve no;

    In a friendly manner, Sidd;A ferryman, yes. Many people, Govinda, o c, o  in my .quot;

    Govinda stayed t in t and slept on to be Vasudevas bed. Many questions o to tell him from his life.

    morning time o start t  ation, t;Before Ill continue on my pat me to ask one more question. Do you eaco live and to do rig;

    Quot;You kno I already as a young man, in tents in t, started to distrust teaceaco turn my back to tuck eaciful courtesan eacime, and a ric eacravelling on foot, eac , on teful to eful. But most of all, I   is necessary just as ama,  man, a saint.quot;

    Govinda said: quot;Still, o to mock people, as it seems to me. I believe in you and kno you  folloeac  you found someteacill found certain ts, certain insigo live? If you o tell me some of t my .quot;

    Quot;Ive s, yes, and insigimes, for an ire day, I  knos, but it o you. Look, my dear Govinda, ts, o pass on to someone always sounds like foolis;

    quot;Are you kidding?quot; asked Govinda.

    quot;Im not kidding. Im telling you  not  can be found, it can be lived, it is possible to be carried by it, miracles can be performed , but it cannot be expressed in aug I, even as a young man, sometimes suspected, . It says: te of every trut as true! ts like trut into  s and said s all one-sided, all just one eness, roundness, oneness. ed Gotama spoke in eaco divide it into Sansara and Nirvana, into deception and truto suffering and salvation. It cannot be done differently, ts to teac tself, s around us and inside of us, is never one-sided. A person or an act is never entirely Sansara or entirely Nirvana, a person is never entirely irely sinful. It does really seem like t to deception, as if time ime is not real, Govinda, I en and often again. And if time is not real, to be beternity, betion.quot;

    quot;; asked Govinda timidly.

    quot;Listen en  in times to come ;times to comequot; are a deception, are only a parable! t on o become a Budd in ty for t knoure today already ture Buddure is already all to  imperfect, or on a slooion: no, it is perfect in every moment, all sin already carries tself, all small cs already ernal life. It is not possible for any person to see ing; in ting. In deep meditation, ty to put time out of existence, to see all life aneous, and t, everytever exists as good, deato me like life, sin like o be as it is, everyt, only my , to be good for me, to do not , to be unable to ever  I needed sin very muc, ty, and needed t so learn o give up all resistance, in order to learn o love to stop comparing it to some o leave it as it is and to love it and to enjoy being a part of it.--ts ;

    Sidd doone from t in his hand.

    quot;t; , quot;is a stone, and er a certain time, perurn into soil, and urn from soil into a plant or animal or , I  a stone, it is  belongs to t because it migo become also a  in transformations, t it importance. t in t. But today I tone is a stone, it is also animal, it is also god, it is also Budd venerate and love it because it could turn into t, but rat is already and al is t, t it is a stone, t it appears to me nooday as a stone, t and see s veins and cavities, in t makes , in tness of its surface. tones aneously and just as muc is a stone, is oily or juicy, and t  me speak no more of t good for t meaning, everyt different, as soon as it is put into s distorted a bit, a bit silly--yes, and t a lot, I also very muc t is one mans treasure and ;

    Govinda listened silently.

    quot;old me t tone?quot; antly after a pause.

    quot;I did it  any specific intention. Or per I meant  love tone, and t and from ree or a piece of bark. t I cannot love eacness, no colours, no edges, no smell, no taste, t  are tion and virtue as  t;

    Quot;Not just a  is a t.quot;

    Siddinued: quot;A t, it mig confess to you, my dear: I dont differentiate mucs and o be , I also s. I ter opinion of t, for instance, a man eaciced t to , it educated and taugo be a god to  kno every le  as divine and kno as muceac as muc o ts,  teac books, only because ;

    Govinda said: quot;But is t ually sometence? Isnt it just a deception of t an image and illusion? Your stone, your tree, your river-- are tually a reality?quot;

    quot;too,quot; spoke Sidd;I do not care very muc. Let t, after all I  makes tion for me: teac: love, oo me to be t important to tand to explain it, to despise it, may be t t Im only interested in being able to love t to despise it, not to e it and me, to be able to look upon it and me and all beings ion and great respect.quot;

    quot;tand,quot; spoke Govinda. quot;But ted one to be a deception. olerance, but not love; o tie our  in love to eart;

    quot;I kno,quot; said Sidd;I kno, Govinda. And be in t of opinions, in te about  deny, my radiction, a seeming contradiction amas rust in ion is a deception. I kno I am in agreement ama.  knoransitoriness, in t loved people to use a long, laborious life only to o teac teacance on s and life tures of  in  in s, I see ness, only in ions, in ;

    For a long time, t;I telling me some of your ts. tially strange ts, not all antly understandable to me. t may, I to ;

    (But secretly  to s, eacly sound ted ones pure teacrange, foolisained in t different from s seemed to me Sidd, ing, er our exalted Gotama  a person of o be like teacrange, may  of  of every part of y, sed teacher.)

    As Govinda t like t in , o Siddo ting.

    quot;Sidd; ;o see tion. I see, beloved, t you  I  found it. tell me, oand! Give me someto be  it often en dark, Sidd;

    Sidd  smile. Govinda stared at ernal searcernal not-finding.

    Sidd and smiled.

    quot;Bent doo me!quot; ly in Govindas ear. quot;Bend doo me! Like t;

    But  dra love and expectation, obeyed  doo ouco s ill druggling in vain and ance to time, to imagine Nirvana and Sansara as one, empt for ting in  an immense love and veneration, to him:

    ead  all seemed to be taneously, ly cill all Siddely painfully opened moutorted from crying--o tioner ions and cramps of frenzied love--retc, motionless, cold, void-- s, of bulls, of birds--ions, ing it, destroying it, giving re-birto it, eaco die, a passionately painful confession of transitoriness, and yet none of transformed,  any time ed, floed ted along and merged antly covered by somet individuality of its o yet existing, like a transparent skin, a ser, and t touc like taneousness above t, delicate, impenetrable, per, perama, t  respect a imes. Like ted ones are smiling.

    Not knoed, ed s, being enced and dissolved in  self, Govinda still stood for a little ations, all transformations, all existence. ter under its surface tly, smiled quietly and softly, perly, pero smile, ted one.

    Deeply, Govinda boears  t intimate love, t veneration in . Deeply, oucting motionlessly, w o him in his life.