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CHAPTER XII

作品:屋顶间的哲学家 作者:梭维斯特 字数: 下载本书  举报本章节错误/更新太慢

    I s to recover its activity; my ts, like rays of ligruggling till confused and imperfect; attimes I felt a return of ted, so to speak, beternate fits of mentalwandering and consciousness.

    Sometimes everyto me, like t inguiser, tle, even ttage perc of , and all is confused and indistinct.

    to tions of a o follos various impulses  troubling myself toseparate tly from one to ts succeeded closely upon oneanother.

    Noled state, see, underneats loud ticking, a female figureappears before me!

    At first sigo satisfy me t s a daug flasar, and ruggle. Sest and t sombre hered garland in her hand.

    After emplated s, I asked  brougo my attic. s of turned toward me, and she replied:

    quot;You see in me t drao its end; I come toreceive your t;

    I raised myself on my elboterresentment.

    quot;A t; cried I; quot;but first let me know w for?

    quot;ill young and vigorous: you aken from me eactle of my strengting an illness upon me; already, to you, my blood is less less agile ted ty in my bosom; ttles of oldage!

    quot;And, as if it  enougo  you ed, and no is o my outence, see to, and misery you ! quot;For t t me co taken care oft find my closetsempty, my bookcase ,stripped, all my poor treasures lost ty? s I cultivated, ttic is despoiled, silent and solitary! quot;As itis only for t fes t I urned to a consciousnessof  ;And ers, for  time of t pressing, can t me, ried to do so? Peruation by er of time--w brougunes upon me:

    strengt,  taken all from me. I rage and loss from t t to claim mygratitude!

    quot;A die despised and cursed; andmay I e on tomb tap inscribed upon tof a king:

    quot;Rejoice, t live again.quot;

    .......................

    I or.

    After  my pulse,  do t oft me, rubbing  tisfaction or.

    quot;ell! so ed old snub-nose to carry us off?quot; said M. Lambert, in; t o  least!quot;

    quot;tor?quot; asked I, rather alarmed.

    quot;Not at all,quot; replied t;e cant give up ; and I make it a rule never to instruments in tend ;

    quot;May ; cried I; quot;and may my ;

    M. Lambert shrugged his shoulders.

    quot;Begin by asking yourself for it,quot; resumed ly. quot;God  you, and it is your o c must keep it foryou. One o alk, t sickness comes upon uslike t one o say in tter. Before o be ;

    I  to smile, but tor looked angry.

    quot;A I am joking,quot; resumed ;buttell me, ttention t o rengtravagance or foolisions in ts of your mode of living as you do of your income?

    Do you consider every evening o tion of yourexpenditure? You may smile; but  brougions?quot;

    I began to protest against to point out tions. tor spread out oreckon upon them one by one.

    quot;Primo,quot; cried ; of exercise. You live  air, motion, or cly, tes badly, tive, do notclaim trition, tomache brain growsweary.

    quot;Secundo. Irregular food. Caprice is your cook; your stomac accept , but akes a sullenrevenge, like all slaves.

    quot;tertio. Sitting up late. Instead of using t for sleep, youspend it in reading; your bedstead is a bookcase, your pillows a desk!

    At time  turnal orgies, and you are surprised to find it t day.

    quot;Quarto. Luxurious s. S up in your attic, you insensiblysurround yourself e indulgences. You must  for your door, a blind for your  for your feet, aneasy-cuffed  at tsign of cold, and a so your lamp; and to all tions, t draugc, and you must acles to support t of day.

    You  you s, and you racted infirmities.

    quot;Quintoquot;

    quot;Aor!quot; cried I. quot;Pray, do not carry yourexamination fart attaco eac;

    tor rubbed h his snuffbox.

    quot;You see,quot; said ly, and rising at time, quot;you rut you areguilty. entem reum! But at least, my friend, do not goon laying time, like an old ;

    t my pulse, and took  ion  an end, and t t depended upon myself.

    or  about reflecting upon w he had said.

    Altoo s true in ten  ion he had begun.

    But is t anotance--t  during t my courage and my arms efficient? S review of souls w pass before ?

    Darest ten terred?

    First, t erred t duly valued too deeply of toxicating y; I o love mensolely because ts; Iracted tion only. t to  is composed of mybrot pass by  , vain of mytrifling knoellect as ot of dress; I take credit for a giftourn tune into ao attack others.

    A days of revolutions, ignorance ed andraised a cry of red against genius, t is not alone in t comes in part, too, from temptuous pride of knowledge.

    Alas! I oo completely forgotten themagician of Bagdad.

    One of truck by an irrevocable decree of destiny, er, proud ofages, laug o go out h him.

    quot;to ; said ;since t notion is a stage,  is only an obscureabyss, at ttom of  to tar s;

    it ao crybitterly. ely ran to riedto console o give ever he desired.

    quot;Can you give me sig; asked the child.

    quot;Fate does not permit it,quot; said the magician.

    quot;t; cried t;I ask you to put out t;

    provoked t ofsome one of my brot see?

    But ener y and  of t!

    ions aken at random! s ticism! done  any sense of my responsibility! ter part of men tation of anoters along a roying t beautiful flowers.

    And, nevert is by tlessness t ted. It rises gradually, like one of teriousmounds in barbarous countries, to  as  being able o see . o see s o view?

    Some time ago I martre telegrapands. Beloed myattention. t, ; and ick in range figures in to me convulsed appeared to me t ening tsening to ouc.

    times sured a feless in ttempt tojustify  tcoat began again immediatelyeningevolutions in to catcil he hill.

    I ly just seen one of tic tyrants ed by tience of tims, and  gods of a family, co be tormentors.

    I cursed t, and I felt indignant t t t be punisurned t top of the slope.

    t glance, and  o me: inplace of ones and terrible looks of anangry man, and ttitude of a frigim, I  citizen, uttered, but o tentive daughter.

    I turned  my mistake; but before I reaced in tion to a distant column of flame.

    A manufactory aken fire, and everybody  in extinguis.

    I ated. Nig tired; a favorite book ing me; I t t of  on myway.

    Just before I  of consideration; no was fromselfishness and cowardice.

    But ten ties time I y ?  alice, and like t claimed successively everyso ask me to return some littleportion, I get provoked, I am angry, I try to escape from it by everymeans. imes, reet,  gone out of my compassion unes of ot I migice against them.

    it satisfaction imes verified to s  he deserves!

    O us not go fart us not go farterrupted tors examination, but y t the soul.

    I was urbed in my reverie by my neighe old soldier.

    No, I seem alo imes leaning against my bed, andsometimes sitting at able, surrounded by s of pasteboard.

    come in ,  scissors. I called tered a joyfulexclamation, and came near me.

    quot;ell! so t is found again!quot; cried aking my t ;it  been  trouble,I can tell you; to wo clasps in.

    I ter  Leipsic, I omact all  out of itself. But  edty-eigtle Corporals campaigns.quot;

    quot;I am not mistaken t;

    quot;ell! I o cross t  made youa bad nurse for  of t; but, ba kno prevent t beggar of a fever from beingdrooer.quot;

    to laugoo muced tospeak, pressed  my breast. ion, andened to put an end to it.

    quot;By-t from to-day you  to draions again,quot; resumed ;four meals, like tor is your e;

    quot;e must find too,quot; replied I, h a smile.

    quot;S; said teran.

    quot;;

    quot;Genevieve.quot;

    quot;t-;

    quot;alking s fear ter or trouble. As long as life and deating for you, t airs to learn . And, stay, I am sure t;

    In fact  to open the door.

    quot;O; continued ;it is Mot, our portress, anotices I recommend to you.

    Come in, Mot--come in; e bonny boys to step a minuet if we ;

    tress came in, quite delig my linen, le bottle of Spanis of  for great occasions. I ext t toro speak. I satentive lybeen t straig on sickness.

    As s time, t I o beconvalescent. t me a ne.

    It o relate minutely all my illness to  everydetail stered loud exclamations; tress  my dinner; eacook isfaction and ted sucion amongtators.

    As taking tered in urn.

    I could not prevent my  beating as I recognized  did o tell me?

    I ed y for o speak; but  doook my  saying a our masters. I could not endure tainty any longer.

    quot;And t; asked I, atingly, quot;aken--terruption to my ;

    quot;terruption,quot; replied tly.

    quot; do you mean?quot;

    quot;Eacook a sy; all ;

    too mucer so many instances of affection, t restrain my tears.

    to do for ottle seed, and everygrain  forth a whole sheaf. Ah!

    tes tor gave me. If it is true t t of our follies andour vices, sympation are also ty. Every one of us, sof y, ion, cer, andpermanent condition.

    Everybody is gone; t me back my floting sun reddens my ains s last rays. My brain is clear, and my lig floats before my eyes, and I feel myself in tate which precedes a refreshing sleep.

    Yonder, opposite t time I  my o eful smile.

    quot;Adieu, beloved year! ly accused. t  be laid to t but a tract t my road--a ground  seen me enjoy; I  seen me endure. Neit t been to eternity, and be blest, t left me experience int memories instead of past time, and gratitude aspayment for good offices.quot;